

A rant, circa 2004you hide from your delusions like they're something to be ashamed of...A rant, circa 2004
you control your thoughts instead of embracing the succulent nectar that is the blood on your lips...
speed and passion and control and death and depth and delusion and construction and revelation and separation and desperation and solace and pain and hurt and healing and heart and friends and decay and release....
calcification and ramifications of things you didnt even know existed...you have to destroy what you think is important before you can live through the deep separation that is your true existence....forget what you know an


DisintegrationYou are running...Disintegration
just running...
you forget exactly what from...
but you know that if you stop you will never survive its clenched teeth and fists...
its as if the universe is just sitting there watching you flail about helplessly while it chips away at you...
one atom at a time...
you fly apart like a bug in the grip of a vacuum...
and your scream is just as loud...
your hands are frozen solid as you watch them crawl through the intervening space to cover your shame...
its nearly over now...
your nails di


CaptionHow do you cope when you have forgotten how it feels to be alive... to exist in a purely emotional sense... when your everyday being is just a shadow of what you know yourself to be?Caption
How do you cope when you know you are just a caption to your own shredded life... its ugly...scarred...broken face thats ultimately invisible to anyone but yourself?
what is this feeling?
The nagging feeling that just wont go away... the itch you just cant scratch... the memories that make you cry because you cant ever get them back...
i haven't cried in a long time...


Desecrated Sacrosanctuarya cold wind within the fears a demented hope within hope the clocks tick and the ravens call and your eyes shut to the tears you should have shedDesecrated Sacrosanctuary
its too long ago now the crows-feet show the strain you try to hide this permanence that you wish was clear this shattered crystal reality that tears your mind and opens your soul to the tempest
you try to consecrate what you are told is real try to hold it, let it become you, let it hold you but you see it through cataracts - a shady reality at best while your soul, naked, screams into the void
(every
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Nel/ Feybles / Heathen Flame
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Caine Arts
Fractolizing the World
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